Monday, November 21

90 Days to a Better Me

Where to begin? Well, 90 days is the general estimate of November 28-February 28 although my goal (which I will get to) is Spring Break. I decided to start the 28th because this week, I work at 11 on Thanksgiving through til 7-9:30pm on Black Friday--yes, I work retail--and I know that if I try to start some kinda get up in the morning and workout and clean and do all these fun, creative things, that I will just totally crash and burn.

Since I've started going to USF, I've totally done just that. I think going from living at home with one room to take care of, by myself, at an 8-4 Monday thru Thursday job with my bff, and no college - to living with Marc in a house/apartment all by ourselves, taking roughly 15 credit hours a semester while maintaining a 40 hr/week job has completely worn me out-even if it hasn't physically worn me out (which a lot of times it has), it has just completely mentally drained me. How do you combat this? CAN you combat this? I mean 40+15=55...then take into account the commute (2+ hrs each school day) as well as all the homework (which luckily, I am amazing at and don't really exert tooooo much energy into). But really, 40 hours a week alone is stressful and to add school on top of it, I have zero days off a week. I'm go-go-go 24 hours a day.

Luckily, my inner personality is also go-go-go. My managers will tell you this. I like to take on more than I can physically handle myself. I hate delegating tasks. I don't trust people to complete the tasks even if I do (though you can sorta blame hands-on experience for that one). Perfectionist? No. Pretty good at things without trying? Yes. So I don't try. I don't push myself. I do what I need to do and move on to the next 8 million "to do list" items that are in my head. OCD much?

So this is a bunch of background bullshit. This is me trying to figure things out. As much as I brag on the outside, I'm totally questioning myself and trying to be better on the inside. Outcome? Accomplish nothing. I can't accomplish anything when I'm trying to do 375 things in the exact same second.

How to fix this problem? MORE OCD! At least, that is my current strategy..kinda a watered down version of it, though. My goal is to create mini goals. Instead of, you will clean your closet out after class Tuesday, make it my goal for the week. Throughout the week, get that closet clean. When I set stringent goals for myself and don't meet them, instead of just moving past it and figuring out how to do it later, I feel totally overwhelmed and don't do it at all. Clean out your closet after school on Tuesday becomes clean out your closet some time in the next 5 years while you spend all 1,824 days feeling pretty shitty about yourself because you hate all your clothes and can't find anything to wear. This needs to end.

How to further fix this problem: Mini prizes! Finish cleaning out the closet? Go pick out a new outfit! Motivation with giant payoff (clean closet + feeling better + new clothes). Woohoo!!

So my *however many* step plan is:

1) Get house organized. I think this is the most important because when I come home from work/school and the house is clean, I feel energized and ready to take on something else before the day is over. Come home and the house is dirty? Let's go to sleep and forget this mess exists.
-squeaky clean
-the "have i used this in the past six months and will i use it in the next month?" strategy
-upcycling? can I use this for something else?

2) Get self organized.
-meal plans
-workout schedule
-time management!

3) Creativity!! After initially getting the house decluttered and cleaned up, I'd really like to put some effort into personalizing things. Knobs or trim on my dresser, new curtains, little things that don't effect the over all clean feeling of the house but will help me feel more at home (and maybe girly...*coughcough)

4) Me time. Seriously. I'm happy if I find time to shower let alone do my nails, my hair, my makeup, etc. Not to mention I totally need a new contact prescription/appt. Mine expired :(

I think the thing I need to do to accomplish this is get into some kind of routine-make it feel second nature. I started doing smoothies for breakfast a few days ago and already it is so much easier to get out of bed and make one-I really have been looking forward to breakfast! Plus it totally keeps me full 'til lunch when I used to be absolutely starving at work.

So, this week's goals:
1) Go jogging again.
2) Clean out my closet!
3) Survive working during Black Friday and get plenty of sleep/rest on Sunday.

Goal's to continue from last week:
1) Smoothies for breakfast-going strong.
2) Keep Bathroom/Kitchen/Living Room ('public spaces') clean: struggling but I think I can come back and do this!


Oh, PS! Spring Break goal---beach, shopping, time off from school stresses (which means I'll have two real days off that week!!!), and feeling/looking totally awesome? Yes, please.

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